Firing a Gun

Gary: So I can be forgiven all of my illusions, no matter what they are, and I can get home even faster. (Note: At this point some gunshots went off in the woods very close to my house - a situation that wasn't uncommon near Christmas, even though deer-hunting season had ended a few weeks earlier. It wasn't unheard of for citizens of Maine to be killed in their yards - or even  their homes - by hunters.

Gary: Don't worry, none of them hit me. It's just some rednecks blowing away a few defenseless animals for pleasure.

Arten : You've never fired a gun, have you?

Gary: No. That's because a man who feels a need to fire a gun secretly feels inadequate about his penis. And a woman who feels a need to fire a gun is secretly jealous because she doesn't have a penis. That's just my opinion. Maybe I'm still upset about that woman near Waterville who was out in her yard with her children; a hunter mistook her for a deer and snuffed her.

Arten: You're slipping, Gary. Forgiveness, remember?

Gary: I'm taking the day off!

~ The Disappearance of the Universe   Facebook.com/DWMJF/photo   Facebook.com/DWMJF/photo